Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Why you need to go to Ambattur by a share auto before you get married

(Roughly inspired by http://www.indiahikes.in/blog-section/trek-blogs/trek-dates/. Please read this link before proceeding with this post.)

As much as I want to travel, I haven't been able to. So worldly experiences are replaced with my cityly experiences, please excuse. I will however focus on Chennai (Madras) for now.

So getting back to the topic. I know you're getting married, there's no need to hide that. I know that in all probability I will not be invited (going by the number of classmates who chose not to, it's a no brainer). I'm basing my theory on the number of "makeup pages" and "photography pages" you have liked and all the new friends you have added via your partner-to-be, which are clogging up my feed as I write. 

Forget treks or scuba diving together or even the task, which is doing the rounds on Twitter, of asking the to-be-significant other to work on a slow broadband connection. An auto ride to Ambattur, nay, a share auto ride to Ambattur is a wonderfully efficient way to check if your partner is worth marrying. Take that ride in May for a really challenging task.

1. Is your partner capable of travelling by public transport? Because it requires skill and only seasoned public transport users can master it. It requires discipline, to stay in the same autorickshaw even if a sweaty, hairy person shoves their elbows on your face. He/she has to stay put, there's no looking back. (There better not be.)

2. Does your partner complain? A share auto ride is not easy. Imagine 14 people packed in a vehicle that should only accommodate 8 people (excluding the driver). Is your partner complaining from the word go? If he/she finds fault with the difficulty of Chennai roads, the other passengers in the auto to the torn seats that are missing the spongy cushions but instead have cold metal rods, which is the only cool comfort you'll ever get in May in Chennai, then I'm sorry to inform you that life with them is going to be similar.

3. Does your partner cooperate and adjust if there is no space to breathe, let alone sit in the auto? 9 out of 10 times you would've had a co-passenger almost sitting on your lap. If your partner cooperates, then they have a kind heart. (Bless them.) Bonus points if they offer their lap as sitting space.

4. Does your partner make the best of situations? On a share auto ride sometimes things go out of control. Someone will feel thirsty and will drink water, which is when the driver will decide to go over potholes and the water may spill on the person sitting opposite (hint: your partner). What does your partner do in such situations? Reach out and slap? Yell and complain? Or remain cool and composed? Your ideal partner is the person who chooses option C. C for cool and composed (see what I did there). If they manage to laugh it off, you have a winner.

5. Does your partner make small chat with the other people in the share auto? Are they "alone" even when surrounded by people? We all value our alone time but mingling with passengers in the share auto is important. It represents the people who walk into our lives, the ones who will be part of our social world. If they're only showing you their Facebook updates and taking selfies to Instagram it later when they are outdoors, they will be a pain indoors (ugh, not that way you sicko).

6. Are they considerate? Imagine a situation wherein someone throws a chocolate wrapper on the auto floor. Does your partner pick it up, keep in their bag to throw it in a dustbin later? Do they talk sweetly to the driver? If they see someone feeling low, do they offer kind words of comfort and solace? If you check all the boxes, congratulations! You have found yourself a thoughtful partner. 

7. Can your partner restrain himself/herself? A share auto ride is indeed a life changing experience, especially during May. When one is dehydrated and almost everything near seems like pools of water and one doesn't reach out thinking they're bottles of water, it shows that the person is patient, kind and mature. Qualities one needs in a stable marriage.
I hope these points have been useful in selecting a suitable partner. Forget trek dates, share auto dates are the in thing now. If it's the former, you have to ask prior permission from your boss, mother, father, pet etc to take a break. Then your dates have to match and these days jadagams are easier to match. After dates come the amount of money required to spend for these treks and the preparation involved is another task by itself. 

A share auto ride, fortunately, costs you nothing, doesn't require a week and maybe only very little preparation (it's all in the mind, you see).

Make share auto dates popular among the youth. (Actually, I have seen numerous couples spending time with each other in a share auto.) They also help single people find their potential others*. 

So go on take that ride for it may change your life.

* Conditions apply

1 comment:

sabarish said...

i live in ambattur and take d share auto regularly. does it mean that i can get any gal to marry me ? :P